Tuesday, November 27, 2007

For Christy

This morning I found out that one of my "virtual" friends died last night, just two and a half weeks after having her second baby. A little boy.

She never suffered the loss of a child, but she certainly went out of her way to reach out to those who had. She held my Thomas in her heart and made sure I knew it. She and her first child, a little girl born two weeks after Thomas, celebrated his birthday every year by making donations in his name and sending me beautiful and thoughtful gifts that showed me must how much they cared - how much his life impacted theirs.

Last night an unknown infection took her life, taking her from her husband and her family, and the two beautiful children she loved so much.

I could rant about the unfairness of it - about the seemingly random nature of fate that wreaks havoc on the people who least deserve it - but I'm just too tired. Too sad. Too heartbroken for Christy's sweet little babies and her husband who is now all alone.

Instead, I'm going to do what Christy did, and ask you if you'll consider doing the same. This Christmas season try to find someone who is suffering in some way and reach out to them - even if it's someone you don't know all that well. Find a way to show them that you care - that you're not afraid of the sorrow that might be eating them alive or the circumstances that have brought them to a place of loneliness and despair.

Christy did this for me. She was never afraid of my sorrow. She was never afraid of my pain. She was never afraid to reach out to me. Ever. She just quietly went about the business of trying to ease my pain by showing me how much she cared, and by remembering my little boy with so much love.

And for that I will be eternally grateful.

Godspeed Christy, and thank you, my sweet friend, from the bottom of my heart.

15 comments:

Catherine said...

I'm so sorry for your loss. I hope Christy's family feels all the love being sent their way during this sad time.

stephanie said...

Oh Kristin, I am so, so sorry to hear of the loss of your friend Christy. I am keeping a good thought for you and Sandy, and for Christy's family. Wishing everyone peace.

Julia said...

Oh, this is immeasurably sad. I am so sorry for your loss and for Christy's family's terrible loss.

Kim said...

I am so very sorry to hear this sad news.

I wanted to respond to yesterday's post - I just got busy yesterday. I know how you feel, in a much more superficial, less heartbreaking sense. It seems as though, while I want everyone else to be happy before I am, that my heart just gets a little more crushed when someone else gets "there." Does that make sense?

Anyway. I love your writing, and I am here.

Kristi said...

I'm so sorry to hear of your loss.

Your request touched me. Almost 20 years ago, one of DH's best friends lost his sister; she was murdered. Last weekend he started helping his mother clean out his childhood home as she downsizes. He came across a cassette tape - he heard his sister's voice for the first time in almost 2 decades. My heart aches for him. I feel like he & DH have grown closer after the loss of our Sara. So I'm baking some goodies to mail to DH's friend, just to let him know I'm thinking of him.

Please keep blogging, I'll keep reading.

Aurelia said...

I'm so sorry, this is just so awful. I'm going to do exactly what you asked.

Sherry said...

This an absolutely perfect way to honor a woman who gave so freely of herself.

Thank you for the suggestion and (((HUGS))).

eilysmama2 said...

Kristin,

I cannot think of a better way to honor my wifes memory that what you suggest. I thank you from the bottom of my heart for all the sentiment and caring that you've shown toward her memory. I know that somewhere she is smiling down on all of us and is going to help get us through.

I encourage anyone who reads this blog to follow my wife's example. Compassion without fear is the most precious gift you can give anyone...Christy did it without even a thought...she knew that she was needed and she just reacted.

Again, I thank you for your kind words and your heartfelt honoring of Christy's memory...

Brent (Christy's DH)

The Goddess G said...

I am so sorry. Keeping you and her family in my thoughts.
~Carole

just another girl said...

My thoughts and prayers are with Christy's family right now. I know how much of a support she was to you and I remember looking at the photo album she made for you when I was at your home last year. I hope Brent is able to get some support from her huge online family - words are certainly not enough to express our loss.

Beruriah said...

I am so sorry for your loss, and for Christy's family. What an incomprehensible loss, for you and her family.

Denise said...

It seems unbelievable that this could happen in this day and age. I remember her as being a caring person that was friendly to everyone on the board. Even her screen name expressed the joy she received from her daughter. What a terrible, terrible loss.

Unknown said...

Kristin, your words are beautiful. I can't think of a better way to honor Christy.

Katie said...

I'm at a loss for words. How awful to think of those poor babies and her poor husband. And poor you, to lose a good friend. I will keep Christy, her family, and you in my prayers.

Ruby said...

I'm sorry to hear about your friend Christy. She sounds like an incredible person.

Life (or, rather death) is so unfair.

So sorry.