Tuesday, January 20, 2009

Sigh

Ugh, forget yesterday's post. My victory. My pride. All of it.

Today I remembered one last article of maternity wear hanging in another closet. I retrieved it...noticed it really doesn't look like a maternity sweater, tried it on, felt how soft it was, remembered that my Mom bought it for me.

And totally couldn't part with it.

It's so cozy! And it really only seems big around the hips, for the most part. It must not have fit me very well when I was pregnant. It can't have. Either that or I was really stretching it out. I mean yeah, it's too big - it's not the size I'd buy if I was buying a sweater NOW - but it's fuzzy, red, soft, and it'll be nice to cozy up in by the fire.

On days when I'm feeling particularly crazy, apparently.

Oy.

Is this weird? Is it?

Why do I need constant reassurance? Why?

Yeah, answer that question too, please.

The end.

7 comments:

bleu said...

With regards to the maternity wear I am not sure I would be anyone who would be helpful. I have not gone through a loss like yours.

What came to mind when reading yesterday and today though was this.

I have maternity wear I cannot part with from my first pregnancy that I cannot wear this pregnancy. It has never seemed strange to me to keep those items. Is it the loss that makes it seem strange or wrong to keep it? I am not sure. I know you don't want to hold on it ways that keep you from moving forward but I also think memories, even unpleasant ones, can be ok to have reminders of.

I hope you find peace with your decisions.

BethGo said...

Well I'm not pregnant and don't plan to be but I still have some maternity stuff lying around. Some of the tops are really comfy as pajamas.
And now that I come to think of it, I have a pair of maternity jean from GAP that I loved that I haven't worn in years but still will never part with. I hold onto things, that's just me.
So if keeping maternity clothing makes you crazy, I'm right there with you.

BethGo said...

And I just remembered, my husband bought me a whole bunch of cute maternity clothes the 2nd time I was expecting. I found out a week after they arrived that I had that blighted ovum thing and miscarried. Those clothes are in a box still somewhere. I don't think I ever could wear them, but I can't give them away either.
I just want you to know that even though we have not had the same thing, you are not the only one who does this. It's ok to hold on to stuff. It's ok.

Catherine said...

Yeah it's weird. It's also weird to put sentimental value into gold bands and ancient stones...but we wear engagement rings and wedding bands without question. It's a sentimental attachment...it doesn't mean you're crazy. Other things may mean you're crazy...but not this. :o)

Scrappy_Lady said...

I don't think this is crazy at all. How many people have a letterman's jacket, prom dress, wedding dress, or whatever in their closet? Why not maternity wear; clothing that represents a very emotional part of your life?

Except for the letterman's jacket, I have each of the items I've mentioned, with no real need to have any of it.

And, I'd like to think I'm not crazy. ;)

Rosepetal said...

Not crazy. Normal. I hold on to many things too. I rescued my Dad's favourite top from The Big Clear Out that my mother undertook and keep it on my pyjama shelf in my cupboard. I don't take it out. I don't wear it. But I know it's there. It's very precious.

Sherry said...

Completely and utterly normal, so stop worrying your pretty little head about it. =)