Friday, July 25, 2008

Wonder of wonders

A good day.

My blood pressure was normal. The doctor was kind. I left happy.

I visited the cemetery on a whim (without feeling that I was dragging the weight of a million tons sorrow behind me), and actually had a very peaceful, sweet visit with my boy.

My lovely sibling gave me a present she's had wrapped up for three years and four months. It was for Thomas - a basket full of beautiful gifts she was going to bring to the hospital when he was born. She's moving (and purging) and was planning to donate it, but asked if I wanted it - or at least wanted to see it - before it departed the premises. I ended up bringing it all home with me. For what, I don't exactly know, but I needed it. It somehow made me hopeful, and when you find hope you hang onto it with all your might. Even if it comes in a little wicker basket.

I had an egg salad sandwich for dinner. On the couch. In front of the TV.

The laundry is done. Mostly.

It's Friday.

My Beloved is finally home after a horrible, long, busy week of late nights and ridiculous stress. He's all mine for two straight days. And we will have fun if he can stay awake.

I have flank steak for the BBQ. Or hot dogs if we're not feeling fancy. Cozy summer weekend food.

We made a decision. No surgery. At least for now. My Beloved suggested we just stop the torment and choose what we were both leaning towards anyway. His plan, and I love it, is to reassess how we're feeling about it in a couple of months - see if it's still sitting okay in our head and hearts. I am 38 and have a million strikes against me, but we needn't allow time to bully us. And today, I feel some peace.

A good day all 'round.


Julia said...

Hope and peace are two things I say need to be grabbed in whatever forms they come. So glad you found both in one day.
Have a lovely weekend.

B said...

Bravo Bravissimo

It is amazing how restoring a bit of time out can be. I'm sitting on the bench and happier then I've been in a very long time.

Amazing you - finding peace and hope. Hold your head high honey.


kate said...

I am so glad you found some peace, and some hope too. I have much hope for you as well.

GhettoFab said...

Just wanted to say hi and thanks for always sharing. You guys are always in my thoughts and prayers