Do you think God can see past the anger and pain to the person you really are inside - to the person you used to be before something so unthinkably horrible shook the very foundations of everything you believe in?
More importantly, do you think he's willing to try?
4 comments:
Sometimes I feel this way too, wondering where in the world He is that something so horrifying should happen. And I remember that there is not much (if anything) that I can experience in this life that He has not experienced already. I've often found comfort in that, even when when the pain is profound.
Hang on, don't let go!
I think we should question and search for answers to things we don't understand. When a tragedy occurs some abandon their faith...others seek out answers and their faith evolves. It's a process...not an easy one...but the fact that you are still willing to take the journey makes me believe that he's looking beyond the grief and anger. I believe he still sees the beautiful person underneath.
I'm trying to figure out how to say this so as to make sense and not offend anyone...hear me out.
I don't think God needs to look past the anger and the grief. I think God loves us completely...including the "ugly" parts. I think he doesn't wish us to be anyone other than the people we are in this moment...or possibly the people we can become (but certainly not the person we used to be). I feel fairly certain that God doesn't wish away parts of our personalities so that he can be more comfortable with us...pretending we are who we used to be. God has no need to look backward and wish for what was. He accepts us as is, warts and all. And he's tough...he can take it if you're pissed as hell at him (sorry about the bad play on words there). He has no need to whitewash you and pretend you are anyone other than the person you are right now...in this moment.
Keep in mind that my thoughts are from the perspective of someone who believes God is love...not some puppet master who plays with our lives based on how "good" or "bad" we are. So maybe that won't jive with what other people believe. I don't know.
I don't think He expects us to live up to some impossible standard - especially after losing our babies. Would anyone have the strengh to do that? We just do the best we can, live our life with a loving heart and try our best to move forward and hang on to hope. (((HUGS)))
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